011. End of the Year Survey~!
Dec. 20th, 2018 10:45 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
monstersinthecosmos
OH WOW, so until 5 minutes ago, I hadn't updated this blog since I did this survey last year. MY FUCKIN BAD. But this was an LJ tradition, I think I've filled this out every year since I was like 15?????? So let's continue!
1. What did you do in 2018 that you'd never done before?
WAS UNEMPLOYED FOR LIKE 6 WEEKS !! First time in my adult life wtf. Went to Disney World! Got an EKG. Got an epidural (and then other one!). Got wasted drunk on the Warner Brothers backlot. Won a settlement! Broke my glasses in a pit. Got to attend a record release party at Jose Mangin's studio.
2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions for 2018? Will you make more for 2019?
This time last year I was still reeling from my car accident and trying to pick up the pieces of my goddamn life and I wasn't about to make resolutions. All I wanted for 2018 was to keep my head above the water AND I LIKE, I GUESS I JUST BARELY MADE IT. It was genuinely the worst year of my fucking life, wowie.
So 2019? idk I kinda got my dream job that I've wanted since I was a teenager and I start on January 6th. I'm dying of anxiety cause I'm so paranoid that it's a terrible idea that I'll hate it and I was romanticizing it this whole time but I GUESS WE'LL FIND OUT. So, resolution? Keep my chin up, do my best, make the most of this opportunity, take lots of photos. I'm gonna be going days at a time without wifi so I'm also hoping it'll be an amazing excuse to work on my fanfics (MAYBE EVEN MY NOVEL LOL) without the internet distracting me! Like The Shining. Get that shit DONE.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
No, but my friend Raph got a new cat so that counts I think. =P
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Tumblr, RIP.
5. What countries did you visit?
I didn't leave the country this year but I did go to Florida, that sort of counts. In 2019 with my new job I'll be visiting twenty-four countries. D:
6. What would you like to have in 2019 that you lacked in 2018?
2018 was such a shitshow, what a low bar to pass. I just want to have enough money that I don't start crying when I have to spend $20 on groceries.
7. What date from 2018 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
April 29th was my friend's wedding at Disney World and it was the day I was supposed to start aforementioned dream job but I failed my medical screening and so I had to try again and put it off till the end of the year, so now I start now!
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Landing this job? Landing it but also like, I failed the medical screening like I said in the last question, and they let me re-apply if I got my shit together. So like, the company has a BMI limit? Don't get me started LMAO. But my BMI was too high so I lost like 35 pounds? idk. LOL. Okay. I've made the least deal about it than anyone else in my life but I'm glad I pulled it off.
9. What was your biggest failure?
My mental health really fell apart while I was unemployed and I still feel really bad about it. I drew away from a few of my friends cause I felt like such a downer every time I would call them or something and only had bad news to share and now I'm in that spot like, I haven't talked to them in so long I feel dumb and it's making it harder to reach out? Idk.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No, but I was seeing a chiropractor for a few months after my car accident and I got an MRI and two epidurals and discovered I have scoliosis and a bulging disc! It's stupid like, the medical treatment I received was strictly because of my car accident and my attorney set it up, and now I know I have scoliosis and like, great? Cool? At least I know why I'm in debilitating pain all the time, but I still don't have insurance so I can't do anything about it LOL>
11. What was the best thing you bought?
I'm really happy I bought tickets to see Jonathan Davis's solo tour, that made me really really happy. ;.;
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
SHOUTOUT TO MY FRIEND YUU who's been drawing a lot and checks in with me and makes sure I write every day, without her I'd be so fucking unproductive lol.
13. Whose behavior made you mad and ill-willed?
FUCKIN DREAMWORKS ANIMATION HAHA yikes
14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent haha.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Voltron!!!!! Also OMG the new Ghost album.
16. What song will always remind you of 2018?
Behemoth - Ecclesia Diabolica Catholica!
I'm definitely guilty of like, sometimes when a new album comes out from a band I love I'm like skeptical and afraid to listen to it but like this year so many good albums came out that I was so EXCITED for and ALL of them fucking delivered. LIKE THE NEW BEHEMOTH? End me, oh my god. Incredible! God they're just, they're so good, they're aging so well, they keep mixing these chaotic dissonant aggressive moments with genuine emotion, slaying me 5ever.
Ghost - Witch Image!
SDHGJLSDG THE NEW GHOST TOO, SO SO GOOD. SO! SO! GOOD!!!!! This is one of my favs off it, it's so catchy and fun but also makes me wanna cry? COOL. Also it reminds me of Armand and Daniel because I'm predictable af LOL.
Starset - Die For You!
I got into Voltron: Legendary Defender this year and this album reminds me SO MUCH of Sheith, like it's the perfect theme album for them? This song is very obviously perfect for them? Keith would fucking die for him? Hello??????? So the last few months while I've been like PEAK obsessed with Voltron/Sheith I've been listening to this album so much just to wallow in my Sheith feelings and daydream about them and develop all my headcanons and fic ideas LOL. I got into a ritual where I was listening to this album every day on the bus on my way home while I read fanfic or something and it would get me all primed and ready to go to write my own fanfic when I got home haah.
Jonathan Davis - Medicate!
I JUST WANNA SHOUTOUT THIS WHOLE ALBUM, IT'S RLY GOOD. I know I'm a Korn fangirl at heart but like, I have a lot to say about how good this actually is and like what an incredible icon Jonathan Davis has been for millennial metalhead kids from the 90's, okay? I went to the record release party to cover it for this website I freelance for sometimes and like I WROTE THIS LIEK 12 PAGE EDITORIAL ABOUT IT LOL but it got edited down so short and makes no sense now, my narrative got butchered. :( Too bad. But anyway it's such a good album about self acceptance and recovery and I used this song as an example because iT'S JUST A REAL NICE SONG ABOUT SELF CARE AND TAKING YOUR FUCKEN MEDS.
This time last year were you:
1. Happier or sadder? SADDER! I'm doing a little better lol. I have things to look forward to even though I'm stressed and anxious haha.
2. Thinner or fatter? I lost a ton of weight! But I lost it enough to get my medical documents signed for my job and then proceeded to stress eat junkfood so we'll see how long it lasts LMAO.
3. Richer or poorer? Richer? Maybe? Idk. I got that car accident settlement money on the way so that's a relief.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
I say photography every year since I've lost almost all my passion for it and that makes me feel really fucking stupid. I guess I wish I'd gone out more. There were a couple times I took the bus way the fuck across the city and it made me realize how much of Los Angeles I still haven't really explored, but like, I've been so goddamn broke ever since I moved out here it's hard to be mad at myself over it.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Depression wall-staring lol.
20. How did you spend Christmas?
Christmas is next week and I'll probably just be chillin out and packing. My friends went home to visit their families so I'll just be alone haha. HAHA. Infected Mushroom is playing on the 23rd and my first Christmas alone in LA they played Christmas Eve and I went and did that instead of moping around drinking alone LOL so I really wanna go again!!!! But idk, I probably shouldn't spend the money. But ugh. !!! I'm considering it LOL.
21. How will you spend New Year's Eve?
I have to be out of my apartment on the 1st so I'll probably be like panic-moving everything last second. I might rent a van or something for the day.
22. Did you fall in love in 2018?
I fell so in love with Shiro it's ridiculous LMAO. But like, vicariously through Keith.
23. How many one-night stands?
None!!!!!! Last year I had one and the year before that I had two in one week, so, I guess I'm growing up or something LMFAO.
24. What was your favorite TV program?
Voltron!!!!!!!!! ;.; God they fucked it up at the end though I'm still mad. But it was really awesome and life changing tbh.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Hate's a strong word lol.
26. What was the best book you read?
This isn't a book, but it's a 235k Yuri on Ice fanfic that FUCKED MY LIFE UP. It's called Behind these Locked Doors and it's this REALLY bizarre AU where Victor and Yuuri have each been abducted and are being held captive in a small room. I started it like "wtf this is so weird?" but I got pulled in so fast and I was like crying hysterically by the end and I get so weepy every time I think about it.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Starset! Maybe Darkher, too, but I can't remember if I got into her in 2017? So good though.
28. What did you want and got?
This job!
29. What did you want and not get?
God let's not even go there. Like my car accident was such a catalyst for SO many things in my life falling apart and just, ugh. A thousand opportunities for stuff I needed and didn't get.
30. What was your favorite film of this year?
idk what my fav new movie was but I watched The Departed like 900 million times. How that's different from any other year, idk. Don't ask.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 30 and went to the roller rink with a couple friends!! :D
32. What's one thing would have made 2018 immeasurably more satisfying?
a car LOL
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2016?
JEANS + METAL SHIRTS, THE SAME THING I SAY EVERY OTHER YEAR. I had a temp job for a couple months and I was wearing officey clothes for the first few weeks until I realized the place was a complete joke so I started just coming in jeans + metal shirts.
34. What kept you sane?
My fuckin group chat on Discord of my fav people who hold my hand for all my life experiences LOL.
35. Which celebrity did you fancy the most?
CARDINAL COPIA? Also Shiro if he counts? Sure. Shiro, let's say Shiro.
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
FOSTA/SESTA and the fucking children in cages? Jfc.
37. Who did do you miss?
idk I miss my nephews I guess. I'm feeling fairly satisfied with the people in my life.
38. Who was the best new person you met?
I made a friend at my temp job who read VC and we had long ass convos about VC and ghosts and music and other shit and it was awesome!
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2018.
I'm more resilient than I realize and I think I've been through enough terrible shit at this point that I can survive more of it.
40. Quote or Song Lyric that sums up your year:
With the mysteries in front of me
I drop my guard and you set me free
I plunge into the great unknown
Wired! Wired! Wired! Strong!
